Navy vs phlebotomy

Ok, so I have a dilemma. I had an awesome interview for a really good phlebotomy job in the UK Healthcare System last week and I’m waiting to hear back from them this week. (Phlebotomy is the act of drawing blood, I.e. the person who sticks you with a needle for blood tests or giving blood, for all you non medical people) But I keep feeling this pull toward the Navy and I don’t know why. My hubby almost joined the Army last year but due to extenuating circumstances and an unplanned heart surgery he didn’t get to. Now after that I keep coming back to thinking about the military every few months and wondering about it.
My parents have wanted nothing but for me to get another phlebotomy job since I quit my last one right before the wedding and they’re so excited about the opportunity with this possible job, but I’m still not sure what I want to do. I have definitly not told them that I’m thinking about the Navy, they would freak out. I thought about being a cop about 6 months ago and my mom lost it, she started telling me about all the horrible things that happen to cops. So of course I freaked out and didn’t apply. Now imagine how she would react to the military.
There is no history of any military people in our family, at least not that we talk about. My grandpa was in the Air Force but he talks more about when he worked with Union Pacific than his time in the military and my cousin’s husband was a Marine. That’s it. I’m just not sure I want to make that kind of commitment, for me or my husband and our future family. I’ve never considered it before, it was never even an option or something on the table of choices. I get motion sick in the car a lot more often than I like to admit, I don’t want to get deployed, I’m not all that patriotic, I’ve never done anything like this before and I’m just not sure what to do. I feel like the thoughts keep coming back to me for a reason, like maybe that’s God pushing me in that direction and I should listen to Him. But what if its just my curiosity because it’s something I’ve never done before or because we were going to do it but never got to? I’m glad that my in-laws are a little more supportive. Ross told his dad that I took a practice ASVAB online and my FIL said he thinks it would be good for me.
Whenever I think about the Navy I get such a sense of peace, which is supposed to be a good sign but I’m still not sure. But I passed a car on my way into my interview that had a little stick family on the window, the stick dad had on little stick figure fatigues and I thought “I want that” and meant that I want that to be me. It came with a strong wave of desire for that to be me, but I kept walking and it all passed. I don’t want to be gone from my life for months for basic training, I don’t want to have to fight in a war and kill people, I don’t want anyone to have to hand Ross a folded flag.
But people say that life begins outside your comfort zone. The Navy would definitly be miles outside my comfort zone. I love to swim (and I love the blue fatigues) which is why I picked the Navy. Ross has a friend in the Navy so I’m thinking about messaging him and talking to him about it. Ross also thinks I should go ahead and take the ASVAB officially just to see what I would get and what jobs I would qualify for since the score is valid and usable for 2 years. (As you can tell, Ross is the only person I’ve talked to about this) I’m just not sure about what I want to do.
I know that it would take at least a couple months from when I decide to get everything rolling, but I’m still apprehensive. I don’t know if I have enough resolve/a good enough reason for joining the Navy to stand up to all the crap my mom will give me for it. I guess that’s what this all boils down to eventually, my willingness to put myself out there and deal with the backlash without changing my mind. I’ve never been able to do it before so I guess that’s why I don’t have a strong conviction about it now but I’m really trying to make this decision without using my feelings. My feelings are pretty fickle so they can’t be trusted with a decision that will affect so many people.
Ross isn’t opposed to the Navy because he can do his job from anywhere and I’m not opposed to it so that’s all that should matter. I just want as many opinions and as much information as possible before I decide. This is why I’m so indecisive! Urgh!
Thoughts? Opinions? Help me!

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Halloween

I really hate Halloween. I really truly hate it. When I was a kid my parents kept us super sheltered so neither me or my brother has any tolerance for anything scary. Other people’s version of mildly scary is terrifying for me. I had an ex once who forced me to go see My Bloody Valentine in 3D with him (you can tell it wad a great relationship, huh?! Hence why he’s an ex!) and I literally cried through the whole movie, real tears in the movie theater. So a whole month when everyone thinks its great fun to decorate their front yards like graveyards full of the “living dead” is definitly not my cup of tea. Everywhere I go there’s zombies and Frankensteins and channels on tv showing nothing but Halloween movies and special shows. Its ridiculous. But at least once Halloween is over its time for Thanksgiving and Christmas!!! My two absolute favorite holidays!!! And this year, I get to host them both for my family since my parents moved out of their big giant house! This will be the first time I’ve gotten to do a big family event since I got married and moved into our house, which was over 2 years ago! So as soon as I make it through the torture of Halloween, I’m rewarding myself with 2 straight months of Christmas music and turkey and snowmen decorations!!!

Fangirling!!!

Yes, I am totally fangirling over Pinterest! As is my usual habit, I was scrolling around on Pinterest while the boys work on their homework (I help them if they have questions of course, but they usually don’t). Once I finished looking through my new feed, I switched to the All page. I saw a Cinderella pin that I had just pinned and loved, kept scrolling then jerked the screen back up again. That Cinderella pin that I had just pinned was the actual pin I just did! My pin made it to the search All page!!! I had always wondered if your pins wouldn’t show up because it was you who was searching but they were showing up on other people’s All pages or how that worked, but how cool is that!?!?! I know, I’m showing how addicted I am to social media and just how much time I spend on it but I don’t care! I’m super stoked!

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You

God doesn’t see you the way that you do. God doesn’t disapprove of you, He loves you and is proud of you. You are empathetic and it’s not a bad thing, its a gift. God sees you having a faith that will move mountains. You have power in and around you. You will be powerful and important. God loves you and thinks that you are beautiful. Meditate on His word and you will be amazed at the things that He opens up to you and for you.

Management

If you are going to snake a mangement job out from under my husband, you had better do your damn job! There is no reason that my husband should be running all over town doing your job, just because you have friends coming in from out of town and your social calendar is busy. If you’re going to go behind my husband’s back and take the job that is due to him, he had better not still be doing your work!
This has been happening in 3 different jobs over the last 2 years. Ross doesn’t have any official management experience so he doesnt get the official manager job (which is bullshit), but the managers suck at their job so Ross ends up doing their work and doing it well (of course). But then the managers get the credit and the promotions while Ross stays where he’s at because he doesn’t get the credit for it.
Ross brought him into this company. If Ross hadn’t made your job a condition of him taking the job you wouldn’t even have this damn job. So somehow that turned into ‘I’m older so I should have the management position even though you gave me this position when I had been unemployed for a year.’ This is such bullshit. I am so pissed off.

Love,Hate,&Body Weight

This is so perfect! No more body shaming!

I don’t know a single girl that loves absolutely everything about their body. If fact I’ll even go out on a limb and say there’s NOT a single girl on this earth that wouldn’t change at least one thing about themselves. Why do we want to change our bodies? Is the grass really greener on the other side??

“love your body”

We hear it all the time… And we see it just as much. It always seems to be the girls who look like Victoria’s Secret models who are advertising it. Uh what?? Well crap if I had your body I’d for sure love it. Wrong. We will ALWAYS want what we don’t have. Whether it’s weight, boys, or fashion accessories. We will never be satisfied.

WHY??? why can’t we be happy. I always ask myself this. Most of you know what I look like, I’m underweight. I HATE when…

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Adrian Peterson

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This picture absolutely breaks my heart. Some jackass killed this adorable little boy for some unimportant reason. Maybe this will wake some people up to the realities of abuse and how common it is. Abuse is a vicious cycle, kids see their fathers do it so they think its ok to do when they get into relationships and if they find a girl who puts up with it the cycle just continues.
I wish there was more awareness for the help of battered women. When I came home after spending 2 years in an abusive relationship, I didn’t even know that there was a shelter for battered women in my city. I felt so alone and so unsure that I did the right thing by leaving, it would have been so amazingly helpful to have some support around that understood what I was going through. So much of abuse is the mental aspect of it, the constant barrage of negativity and the reinforcement of what every girl fears way down deep inside. People don’t understand that its more than just getting away from the person who hits you; its having to get over the thoughts in your head that tell you that you aren’t good enough, that you will never find anybody else because you are so screwed up, and that you aren’t worth it. Its been 5 years and I’m now happily married to an amazing guy but I still have bad days. It took me years to stop having a knee jerk reaction of fear every time I saw the same model car that he had, I still get upset when people yell and I still have nightmares sometimes.
Recovering from abuse is a process that requires support. The cycle of abuse needs to be stopped.

Don’t compare

Don’t compare what you would do for him to what he does for you. You are two very different people and you can’t expect him to do things how you would do them. You love him for him, not because he acts like you. So quit letting your emotions convince you that he isn’t paying attention to you, or that he doesn’t care about you just because he handles things differently than you would if the situation were reversed.

Faith

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I saw this on Pinterest today and I definitly needed it. I had a total freak out on my hubby today, over money of course. I am super stressed out over money, the fact that I haven’t been able to find a new job yet (even tho I will find the perfect job that God has for me!), the fact that the stupid government is shut down and talking about not being able to pay their debts so the rest of us have to pay the price (I.E. being unemployed during another Great Depression) and so on and so forth. My poor hubby came home to find me sitting in the shower crying my eyes out over all the enormity of my overwhelming stress. But he is so sweet, he just listened to me freak out then gave me some space and came back later to calm me down. I thank God every day that he put Ross into my life, he is exactly what I need. I just really can’t wait until this brokedy broke broke broke phase of our lives is over and we never have to deal with it again!